At two junction

Gosh! It has been ages since I update anything. I have been busy playing with Wordpress that I neglected my first born baby here... Well, frankly speaking, I have not written anything in English for so long except for the emails that I have to respond in the office. Otherwise, I've been busy polishing my Bahasa, which I'm proud to say that I have improved compared to two years ago. That is a big change for me. However, I'm still struggling to respond an official email in Bahasa. Words didn't come that easily whenever I tried to write in Bahasa. Hopeless case! Hahahahaa..


Well, of late I have been thinking a lot, thinking about my future. Where I want to be not in few years time but next two months. Yup, my contract with 7E is going to end this October. To be more specific, it will end in mid-October. Not that they don't want me, but it was more of whether I want to continue with them.


Before I decided to come back from the semi-retirement, I was working on my pet project or sometimes, I called it Option B. I have been dreaming of this project since four years ago. Of having a bookstore and selling stationary, but over the years,  it changed. From stationary to cafe. So, for the past two years, I was working on the idea. Looking at the fund and the market and so on. Finally, I got the chances when I opted to accept the Maxis scheme. Off I went and happily putting the vision into the plan.


But... the vision, the dream was stopped by my sleeping partner. It took me about a year to convince him of this bookcafe concept. We started looking for the ideal location, and we found it and now we are ready to move to second gear. I also work on the timeline where it will be ready just in time when my contract expired.


The current project, which I'm currently involved is expected to complete by July, but lo and behold... the project got delayed. From July to October and now seems it will be delay further.


I scratched my head. I thought if the rollout takes place in July, the operation stabilization is expected for three months, then it is just nice for me to leave. But it doesn't look that way. Hmm... I can't be selfish and just pack and go. But my conscious mind tells me not to abandon my team. They are a young team. They need guidance, and they have been telling me not to go too. They wanted me to continue at least for another year.


At the other end, my pet project is taking shape. The idea that I conceive is slowly turning into a reality. The project is my new baby. I wanted to see it grow from an unknown to someone. I don't want to miss the steps, the fumble, and the push it going to make. I want to be there. To be together with my crew and to get the satisfaction of running my baby. It will give me the satisfaction.


In one hand, it is my responsibilities to my beloved team, while, on the other hand, it is my responsibilities to my own satisfaction and family. I have to think really hard about it and to decide the way to move forward. People might say, hire someone to run the business, but will I get the satisfaction? Maybe not.


So it is a tough decision for me. It is between my obligation to my team, my boss and my CIO versus my dream, my passions, and future... Whatever it is, I have him, the ALMIGHTY,  to seek for guidance. Insya Allah, I will able to make the decision soon. Meantime, I'll let my mind do the pro and con of continue to work or leave.

Until then.. goodnight.

Gonna Miss Them

Who will I miss most now that I’m no more the resident of the level six? Will it be my boss? Nah… he is just one of the guys.

What about my team? Yeah… I will surely miss them.. They are a bunch of good girls. Let see who they are.

Suja, my sidekick, who has been with me through thick and thin, who together swim, drown and float with me during the early days of outsourcing, who struggled together to understand those $$ signed and making a sensible report out of it.

Yeah…I have to say that our relationship is not only as a boss and staff but also as a friend. Sitting next to each other gave us lots of opportunity to gossip, and one thing that I’m going to miss most is teasing her.

Emma, Inez, and Julia are the other three ladies who I’m gonna miss too. Haha…they must be relieved now. No more tapauing for Zai. Actually, these young girls are my teachers. Whenever there are new jargons, they will be my reference point. Occasionally, they are my partners to discuss on the novels that we shared.

I’m gonna miss Kit, or sometimes when I’m in a teasing mood, I called him Kit Kat. He is the tallest guy on the sixth floor. There were a lot of things that we shared, mostly like kakak and adik. Whenever something bothers him, he will squat down between Suja and me. I knew then that he had something on his mind. We are basically a team. We can gang up and tease Inez and Suja at a click of our fingers. Same wavelengths when it comes to teasing. Ohhhh… how I’m gonna miss those moments.

I’m gonna miss the rest of the CCG teams too. Chris and his finance team are the busiest team. Always huddled together to look at the figure, and if not lucky all three will be sitting around the big boss table.

The contract team, Daniel, Anne and Ivan, is the quietest among the three groups. They daily activities are to read through the contracts or deals with things pertaining to contracts. They will sit and stared at the contracts and will only get up whenever there is something to discuss.

The noisiest team among the three is my team. Sourcing team or Girl Power, where we deal with vendors for quotation and other related sourcing activities. Haha there were times you can hear Inez screaming and shouting at someone over the phone. Hope she will tone down later. Don’t want her stress level to go up.

Others that I’m gonna miss is Mei Khuen and Wan. They are my basically my lunch buddies whenever my BFF not around or whenever times permit. I’m gonna miss our lunch at the break out area where we shared one story after another.

But one person that I’m going to miss most is Yati, My BFF. We shared a lot and discussed our life, our faith, our kids, hubbies, and families and of course about works. With Yati, it will always be a serious discussion, looking for some solution or advise. Our friendships will not stop here. We can always interact through phones and other media.

Also, I’m going to miss the people on the sixth and fifth floor. Even though I do not have any close interaction with some of them, but the spirit as one ISD is there. You have shown it during the teambuilding. Keep up the spirit and raise to challenge, my fellow ISDians…

My two wives...

This blog has been very quiet. It slowly gathering dust, but I hope that I will come here regularly and clean the dust. Not a promise but I will try my best to be here.

Do you know that when I created my malay blog, I never expect to feel like I have two wife. The English blog is my first wife or an old wife where my malay blog is my new wife. Like a man who practice polygamy, I also felt the same. I spent so much time with my new wife, until I feel like I neglected my first wife. Nauzubillah... di jauhkan dari perasaan ini....

It is not my intention to spend more time with my new wife, but I found that sometimes, it is easier to write there than here. Maybe, I don't care about my grammar or my language on my malay blog. The language is more relax. Casual.

When I first created this blog, I was kind of free. Not much work at that time, and I kind of having lots of free time. But not the past few years. It was hectic! The workload eased after the team has more members and some of the work has been distributed to others. Now I have more time to myself to do other things...

Hmm....What will I do with this free time? More blogging time? Maybe. What else? Reading. I can't live without books. Every where I go, I must have books. Either physical book or soft copy, it doesn't matter. As long as I can read. But don't give me journal or technical document. I won't read that!

Two years ago, I bought this book, the Doctor in the House for my hubby. A very thick book and frankly speaking, I haven't read any single page of it. But I hope, really hope that one day, I will read it.

Oh yeah...will I be running out of book? I don't think so. Because this itchy hand will always find a way to surf the online shopping and click the add to cart. Two days ago, I bought 5 more books, and in total, I have around 20 books that I haven't read.

I don't know which one I preferred. Physical book or ebooks? I like the smell of the new books, and it is my dream to have a book store. Only a dream, OK! but problem is storage.

Storing my books is always an issue. I guess I need to have a dedicated bookshelf for me.. Yeah!!! Oooppss where will I put this bookshelf. Most of the space in my house has been taken. Argghhhh...Problem...

So a mixture of ebooks and pyhsical books will be better... but of late, I seldom read my ebooks. My kids always hijacked my iPad, and by the time I get my iPad back is when the battery runs out. Another problem right....

Anyway whatever it is, I still have something to reads, and I can run to the wonderful world of fictions...

What did you call me?

Hahaha...today I saw a memo written up by Mr Han for the new guy. Heh! He wrote that I was an unqualified staff to manage the departmental budget. Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! I shouldn't take this function when he was desperate for someone to help him do the budget. I should say NO to him earlier, but I'm a nice person. Don't know how to say no. I admit that's my problem. My hubby said the same thing too.

Did I get angry when I saw that? No, because there's a truth to that. I'm a pure IT person. I never take any accounting or finance classes when I was in college. Oh! I did learned some basic accounting when I was in lower secondary school, and I know the terms debit and credit,  but the rest are all fuzzy.

When I was 'forced' to do this budget, I had few sleepless nights. To make it worse, the handover that was done (in total 10 hours) fit for someone who has worked in finance line for years. Not for someone like me.

But whatever it is, I did enjoy handling it. I learned new things, made new friends, especially those from the finance department. They helped me a lot, and not as claimed by someone. That particular person knows how to assign and delegate only.  I would talk to others first before I go to him, but to be fair he did give some guides.

By the way, I can't wait for the new guy to join us next month. I would not dump everything to him on day one. It would scare him off. Furthermore, the budget exercise is about to start, and he can have all the fun staying up late preparing that.  I already told Mr. Han that I don't have the bandwidth to do the budget exercise when I have my own work to do. Ahhh.... Pity, pity me! ...I have been neglecting my work since I took over this finance thingie. Hmm... It sounds like a fling eh? Now all the sweetness had gone, I'm going back to my own work.

My dear loyal work is waiting for me patiently.  Sorry work, I know I have not given much attention to you, but don't worry; you will get my full attention next month. Another four more weeks to be exact. Then I'm yours! Totally yours!!!!!!! But then, I have to leave you for a short while, to be a guess of the holy land, but I know I would leave you in a good hand.

Sekian. Salam.

Tired, Sleepy and Floating

I didn’t blog yesterday because I was too tired and sleepy until I felt like my body floating. I only had about 8 hours of sleep in two days. On top of that, there were so many things I need to do yesterday in the office, until I had to continue to do work at home.

I seldom brought back my laptop home since my back problem gotten worse. But because the bosses need the information urgently last night, I have no choice but to drag my laptop. Poor me! 

I told my boss that if I didn’t come to work today, it means that my back had a problem. He has a cheek to ask me what’s wrong with my back, even though he knows that I have been having slipped disc. I felt like ‘cekiking’ him, but I didn’t. I just walked off and packed my things because I was already late to pick up my son from his Math tuition class.

I thought I could reach my son with 45 minutes, but I was wrong. The traffic jam was really bad. I was stuck at NPE for almost 45minutes, and another 30 minutes on KL-Seremban Highway. Because I was really late, the teacher was kind enough to send my son to Saujana Impian. It saved me another 10 minutes drives. I was told by my son that the road leading to his teacher’s house was also jam. Phew! Otherwise, I would be breaking my fast in the car.

After the buka puasa, I told my kids not to disturb me as I had work to do. Lucky they were tired too, so they didn’t disturb me that much. 

Huh! I thought I could finish my work in one hour, but Allah has a different plan for me. Instead of doing my work, Allah asked me to rest. How come? It was because I can’t get connected to the SAP system to check on the figures. I tried and tried and tried until I gave up. I SMS my boss, and told him that I would submit it in the morning.

Since I was too tired, I didn’t hear the alarm clock this morning. When my hubby woke me up at 5am for sahur, everything was ready. Hehe! I only help to clean and wash the dishes. Best thing was I got to continue to sleep after my Subuh prayer too, and hubby get the kids ready for school.

But damn! I’m still tired.

When I can't resist the temptation....

Today, my table was full of files and paper. Huh! When CL left, I have to do most of his work even though I know nothing about Finance. From the job description, it looks easy, but I know how tough it is.

I had the experience of managing the budget for three months in 2009, and that was the most depressing time for me. I have to learn how to use the system; understand the budget and all other processes that related to it. But I survived because the previous guy who managed the budget was still around to help me. This time, no one can help me, and I hope we can get someone fast to do this.

Yesterday, I was still able to do as CL was so kind and came to office. He showed me what to do, and where to get the file. But today, I was really having fun trying to figure out what to do. After, clicking here and there, I gave up. I will need to get the expert to show me how to use the system.

To make it worse today, I can’t access CL’s laptop. His window’s id was disabled, and I need to copy his document into my laptop. Ughhh! I have to call Service Desk to do that, but by the end of the day, I still can’t access it.

But my frustration doesn’t last long. While waiting to figure how to use the system, and how to get the data, I received an email from Apple announcing, “iPad2 is here.” I made a mistake. I shouldn’t click it, but I’m weak. The iPad2 kept on waving and winking at me. I succumbed and purchased it via online.

I don’t regret buying it on-line even though I have to wait until mid May before I can get my iPad2. I heard the queues at the Apple stores were crazy. There were long queues everywhere. Hmmm… If I can wait for few months, why can’t I wait for another two weeks? Right?

And dear iPad2, welcome to my collection of gadgets. You will serve me well.

Sekian. Salam.

Old Habits Die Hard!

Last year, I made a resolution to go back early from work. I did it. I kept to my plan except when I have something unavoidable, and then only I stayed back.


This year, I didn't make that resolution and guess what? I have drifted back to my old habit of going home late. Actually I like to go back late. It avoids the stress on the road. 


When I first started working in KL and I was single at that time, I have nothing to look forward to when I go home. Instead of spending time alone at home, I stayed in the office or went out with my friends.


Then when I moved to work in Jalan Tun Razak, I stayed back because of the traffic jam. That was in late 1990s and the road system was not like today. After ten years of staying back late, it becomes a habit. 


 I also found out that I work best in the evening. I have lots of idea in the evening.  In fact, last couple of years, I found it easier to craft some nasty love letter in the evening compared to in the morning. What can I say except my brain works best in the evening? 


However, my little girl is not happy that I came back home late. For the past two months, every morning she asked me to come back early. I just smile and didn’t say anything.


Now after we have our land line installed by Telekom, almost every evening she would call and remind me to come home early.  Did I leave home early? Nope, I didn’t and I feel guilty because my kids are all waiting for me at home. Hmmm…I guess it times for me to start sticking to my last year plan again. What say you? Should I?

Update on Driveathon

Well here is the update on the Driveathon. If you have not read my earlier post on it, you can read it here.
 
Well, what can I say when mother nature has different plan. Instead of bright and sunshine day, it was raining heavily this morning and when it rains, it means everybody will be late due to traffic jam. That was what happened to me! 
 
I left home at 6.50am because I planned to meet Yati, Janice and Tee at 8am for breakfast at KL Sentral. Since it was raining, I dropped Amir off at his school first before heading to Saujana to drop Syafiq. I thought that it will not jam because it was very early but I was wrong. On the way to Saujana, on the opposite side, I saw the jam started from Sungai Chua itself. 
 
After I dropped Syafiq, I made a quick called to my hubby asking him the alternate route to KL. He proposed Grand Saga Highway but when it rains, the highway is far worst than SILK Highway. I decided to proceed with SILK Highway and as expected I was caught in the jam for 45 minutes. 
 
At 8am, Janice called, "Hey dear, where are you?"  I replied, "Still at Kajang and I'm stuck in a jam." I SMS Yati and told her I will be late. She replied, "Me too." . 
 
I reached KL Sentral at 9am and headed to La Cucur where the three was waiting at me. I had nasi lemak, kuih bakar and teh-tarik for my breakfast. When I finished my breakfast, it was 9.25am. I said, "Let's go!" and we headed not to the car but to toilet first.
 
Since Tee and Janice didn’t know the way, they decided to follow me. Luckily from KL Sentral to the starting point only took us less than ten minutes.   
 
I drove slowly as we have to make 15 calls per round. After every call, I have to tell Yati the name of the place. Therefore I was quite busy looking for the landmark and the name of the place. It just took us less than 30 minutes to reach our end point. In the first round, I missed the turned and ended up in UNITEN.I have to make a quick called back to the route owner to get the right way back to KL. 
 
As we were heading for second round, Janice called me and told Tee was not feeling well. I was told that he vomited and they then changed role after that. 
 
When I reached my start point for round two, I was already felt tired. The day has slowly getting hotter. Luckily Yati brought chewing gum and gave me one piece. It helped to keep me awake. 
 
I missed the turning point again in the second round. If the first round, I went to UNITEN, the second round, I took a different exit and ended up I have to drive for another one KM before I can made my turn back to KL. By this time, Yati already was feeling unwell.  
 
When we reached the Loke Yew roundabout for round three, Yati told me she felt like vomiting and true enough when I stopped at the Shell Petrol Station she vomited. We have to stop and cleaned the car before we can proceed. Since it was almost lunch time, we decided to stop at Mines Resort for our lunch break. 
 
We were there for 1½ hour and once both of us felt okay, we continued our driveathon. This time, we found the right turn and headed back to KL for the fourth round. By 2.50pm we completed all the 60 calls as required. No major issued found on the network and I was also glad that there was no major mishap or accident happened. It was a successful driveathon for us. 
 
When I reached KL Sentral, we were too tired to go back to office. We took a 30 minute breaks at Coffee Bean and by then my headache started. I SMS my boss and informed him that I won’t be coming to office and headed home. 

A balance work life is important!

I took leave on Wednesday and Thursday, just to spend my time with the kids. After two days with them, they wanted me to stay home today but due to work commitment, I didn't.

I met Yati for breakfast. She also just got back from leave. I told her there was someone died in the office yesterday and she told me who was the person. Then as I was catching up with my mail, I saw an email from HR on the demise of the staff. It was so sad. He died due to heart failure.

Sometimes when I think about it, life is cruel. Just imagine, yesterday morning before he left for office, he was in good condition. Neither his wife nor his kids suspected that they will be saying goodbye and see him alive for the last time.

When I really think about this, it makes me realize that work is not everything. Our life, our health and our family are more important than work. It is time for me to have a healthy lifestyles. Anybody want to join me? Yes? No?

Okay, let’s exercise and eat healthily. Let's have a balance work life so that we can enjoy more time with our loves one. And hmmm…when should I start my exercise? Is tomorrow too soon?

Sekian…Salam.. 

What's Wrong With Me

I had Rosemary beef pie for lunch and coffee today but I was still sleepy. I thought that by skipping rice and having coffee will help me to get through the afternoon, but it was not. Not sure why I was so sleepy today but I have been yawning since morning. I felt everything moves very slow today.

When I saw maruku on my friend table, I happily took a piece. This is one of my favorite

maruku but the moment I bite it, it felt like I'm biting into a piece of brick. It was so damn hard.

I thought I'm the only one having problem eating the maruku but my other colleagues also find it hard. So we sit around my place and everyone busy chewing the maruku and start commenting and analyzing what was wrong with it. My friend who bought the maruku said the one that she tasted at the stall was soft and nice.

I wish that instead of discussing the maruku, I can discuss my current WIP that has not moved for the past two weeks. I kind of lost my creativity and motivation since my parents are diagnosed with cancer and my brain has becomes slow.

I'm not sure when I can get out from this situation but I hope that it will not be too long.

Meanwhile, I need my sleep and also please pray for my parents.